DeathWatch No. 103 – You Have One Week

This is Issue #103 of DeathWatch, an ongoing Serial. Click that link to go find ‘A Beginning’ and read from there, if you need to catch up.

Happy Reading!

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* * *

“Jet.”

The voice was familiar, but Jet didn’t want to hear it, didn’t want to listen. In the forefront of his mind was his rage, his misery. He had already lost everything, and then rebuilt. He would have to lose it all again — and why? For no reason he could discern. For Fate, perhaps. Because that is what was foretold. He stared at Secta, and the young man trembled in his grasp, tears in his eyes for how he was held up by a fistful of hair.

“Jet.”

Slowly, Jet lowered Secta back to the floor, his heart still thundering in his ears. He released Secta, and the poor man dropped to his knees, disoriented. Jet turned and looked over his shoulder, and felt his heart stutter.

Immanis stood there, tall and proud, dark eyes watching. He looked at Jet almost impassively, though his gaze, as it lingered, grew less and less devoid of feeling, and more and more full of the fire Jet felt within himself.

Jet met his gaze, and said nothing, for a moment. He stepped away from Secta and looked down at him, knowing his heart should hurt to see the young man rattled, stunned into silence by fear. Instead, he felt nothing, and in that he wondered what so many others had found themselves wondering — just how much had he changed? “Leave me,” he commanded, sending Secta on his way, baring his teeth with the words. He looked to Immanis, and took no more note of Secta’s departure than he would of a fly buzzing away. The gulf between him and the Prince seemed immeasurable; he stared across the void and waited. “What is it–?” he finally asked, biting off the question before he could say ‘brother’ or worse, ‘my Immanis’, for he knew no one could be his for long.

“Your self pity is unbecoming,” Immanis said abruptly. “If you cannot control yourself, at least shut yourself away until your temper tantrum is over.”

The shock on Jet’s face lingered for longer than he would’ve liked; he stood taller, closed his mouth, and gave the briefest of nods. “Is there anything else you wish to tell me?” he asked, refusing to acknowledge the heat that touched his cheeks, the shame that he felt crawling up the back of his throat as though it could choke him.

“Make your peace with your famulo. It would be difficult to find another to fill the position so faithfully,” Immanis declared.

“Your concern is duly noted.” Jet all but growled the words; the hand holding his glass knife curled into a tighter fist. “Anything else?”

Immanis’s dark eyes grew brighter, but Jet could not tell the emotion contained within. “The wedding will take place in one week.”

Jet felt his heart tighten, his body grow tense. “One week,” he repeated, nodding. “Does she know?”

“She does.”

“Is she ready?” Jet asked, his voice softer.

“Are you?” Immanis countered.

“I will do as you command,” Jet said softly. “I will do what Ilona needs. I will live and die at your hand, Majesty,” he said, his spine stiffening. He stood tall, straight, his expression blank, his eyes cold and dark as unlit coals. He stared off into some middle distance, without meeting Immanis’s eyes. He would keep his word. He had been abandoned before, and he would be abandoned again, but he would keep his word.

“My sister deserves more than a man who will see her as a duty,” Immanis noted. “I have given you the highest honor that I may, in securing her hand for you. You saved her life, and I made you my brother. You saved my life, and I gave you her hand. You defended the city against an invading army, and saved my life a third time — we are bound together, are we not?”

Jet turned to look at Immanis, exhausted, and was shocked to see a look he did not expect: pain.

“Tell me, my Black Stone, do you truly feel nothing?” Immanis asked quietly. “You are not a prisoner here,” he said, and his voice broke. “You know this, yes? My sister’s hand is a gift of gold, not a chain of iron.”

Tired of explaining himself, Jet said “She does not love m–”

I do!” Immanis all but shouted, his fist striking once, twice against his tattooed chest.

Stunned at the words, Jet said, “Then… why are you trying to make me marry Lucida?”

“I marry you to my sister because Ilonan law requires her to have a Prince and I trust no one else! I marry you to her to keep you close to me!” Immanis said. “Your heart will be a prize before long. Other families will vie for it. I could not breathe, thinking another might possess you.” Immanis stood close, trying not to shout, gesturing wildly.

“You wanted me to marry Lucida months ago. Before we ever–” Jet said quietly.

“I knew you were different when you knelt before me, and would not bow to my will,” Immanis murmured. “I knew you alone could love me with your own heart. Not whatever I commanded of you. What would you have me do, chase you?” he whispered. “I had thought you mine, already. The Westlander had poisoned me. I was a prisoner in my own flesh, dying a slow death, cold and colder, alone, but then you were there. A bright spark amidst the frigid night. You woke me. I tasted blood and fire and you were there, were you not?”

Jet’s cheeks burned, and he looked down, lost.

“You were there in my bed, were you not? So let us not pretend. You came to me a foreigner and you were unaffected by my powers. You fought for me. You died for me. I gave Lucida to you in promise, to keep you near to me, my Black Stone,” Immanis said. “You could have let me die under Plaga’s sword. You could have let me die from the Westlander’s poison. Yet you did not,” he murmurs. “I must believe it is because you feel as I do.” A look of hope settled tentatively over Immanis’s features, making his face almost radiant.

“I cannot,” Jet whispered. “I do, and yet I cannot.” I love another. A boy who is a man now, perhaps, if he still lives. And I cannot let you love me. You die, loving me.

Immanis’s expression fell. He turned, at once, before Jet could see the tears in his eyes, and moved to leave the room, sweeping away, sudden and almost in retreat.

“Immanis,” Jet began, reaching after him.

“You have one week,” Immanis interrupted, turning back, his eyes cold, his jaw set. “And then you shall make your decision.”

“My decision?” Jet asked.

Immanis nodded, his teeth clenched. “You will wed Lucida, or–” He looked both furious and lost as the words hung in the air.

“…or?” Jet prompted softly, frowning. Would Immanis put him in the hunt?

Glittering dark eyes watched Jet; great wells of tears remained unshed. Immanis’s voice remained steady, somehow. “Or I will let you go.”

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DeathWatch No. 102 – Jules Jumped With Me

This is Issue #102 of DeathWatch, an ongoing Serial. Click that link to go find ‘A Beginning’ and read from there, if you need to catch up.

Happy Reading!

PREVIOUS

* * *

Headed for the horizon, Kieron saw Hana, and when she saw him, she was both shocked and ecstatic.

She threw her arms around him, and then pulled back, now shocked and awkward. “Sorry, sorry — I’m just… You’re alive! Have you… where’s… ah. That’s a lot of blood.”

“Jules jumped with me,” Kieron explains. “I’m positive she made it down. She’s got to be around here somewhere.” He ignored the comment about blood, and kept running with her. Along the way, they stumbled upon Djara, who had been grazed by a bullet as well; a bloody crease ran across her temple. She looked stunned, but grateful, saying, “Have you seen Penny?”

“No — have you seen Nate? The Captain? Jules?” Kieron asked.

“I only just got up. I think I passed out,” she explained. “Nate and the Captain — they weren’t even wearin chutes when they sent us over.”

Kieron’s heart seized to hear those words, but he had to assume they just went after everyone else had gone off.

Djara kept talking, frowning, trying to concentrate. “We went in waves, but when we came out of the clouds, the fucking Ilonans were already shooting at us. I didn’t pull my cord until I had to; I didn’t want to be a slow target. I think something got me anyway,” she said, reaching up to gingerly touch her scalp.

“C’mon,” Hana said. “You’re both bleeding, death’s still coming. We need to get out of here.”

“We should go for the ship,” Kieron said.

“No,” Djara said. “That’s where the Ilonans will go. We need the officers, and we need to get moving.”

“Lead on,” Kieron said, gesturing to the horizon, looking around at the soldiers who were trying to grab their chutes and gather.

“Let’s go!” Djara shouted. “Come on, mac fraochan! I think Ilona’s trying to send us home! Let’s not be rude and overstay our welcome!” Their group grew larger as they ran. North, the valley gave way to foothills with forests; they weren’t far from them.

All they had to do was keep running.

Their ragtag group, Kieron, Hana, Djara, and a bunch of other crew and cadets, moved as quickly as they could, making their way north. More than a few Ilonans were hitting the ground, and giving chase. Some of the Jacob’s crew had weapons, and the Ilonans dropped, shocked to have been shot by people they assumed were already defeated. Within only minutes, the crew had crested one small hill, and come across a couple soldiers helping one another up.

And Jules.

Kieron nearly wept with joy as he saw her, and put on a burst of speed to reach her, where she knelt on the plain, over a still form.

As they approached, she stood and pulled the chute over the body, wiping her eyes. She walked away from the body, moving to meet them.

He looked at her, fear on his features, and she shook her head, and in that moment, he felt more relief than he knew how to name — but at the same time, more guilt than he’d ever known.

He was so glad it wasn’t Sha, wasn’t Nate — whoever it was had almost not mattered.

Except it mattered to someone.

Hana was looking past Jules, at the body, and she wondered aloudg, “Can — can we help?”

“No. It’s too late. She’s… she’s gone,” she said, and then looked to Djara, stopping in front of her, her expression apologetic. “We have to go. The Ilonans are already surrounding us. I’m s–”

“Wait, what?” Djara said, looking over Jules’s head and shoulders, past her, to the body Jules had covered. “Who–”

“I’m so sorry, Djara,” Jules said, reaching up a hand.

“You talkin’ bullshit,” Djara said, a look of panic sweeping over her face. “No, no no no–” She broke into a run, shoving past Jules, shouting. “Penny? PENNY! NO!” She staggered, leaned to pull back the chute, and then dropped to her knees, a long, high wail escaping her. She keened as she pulled Penny’s bloody form into her arms, bowing her head. Without regard to the enemy soldiers closing in, Djara sobbed openly, brokenly.

Kieron watched as Hana stood next to her, putting a hand on her shoulder, wanting her to know she wasn’t alone.

“We have to run,” Jules said, looking them over, still shaking, her voice rough.

Hana looked up and swallowed. “It’s too late,” she said Hana, still sounding shaky.

“No,” snapped Kieron, determined to make a stand. “We’ll–”

“No. Brody. It’s too late,” said Hana, pointing with a trembling hand.

Kieron tore his gaze from where he watched Djara mourning Penny, and saw how their small band was surrounded. From all sides, Ilonans were closing in, with gun and spear and taser and sword.

Cornered, in pain, facing down the enemy, Kieron bared his teeth. He stood tall, hands clenching — and realized he was still holding Jules’s gun, from when she handed it to him while she checked his buckles, before they ran, before they jumped, a hundred thousand lifetimes ago. He tossed Jules her gun, and pulled out the taser she’d given him. He turned around, putting his back to Djara, and his comrades turned with him. They made a wall around their grieving friend, their fallen sibling.

“Centralites!” shouted one of the Ilonans. His face was bloodied, his uniform was bloodied, but he marched forward. He lifted a massive sword, and leveled it at them. His voice was commanding, demanding. “It’s over! You are outnumbered!”

“Fuck that!” Jules crowed, almost laughing. “An’ fuck you!”

The Ilonan arrogantly put his sword away, and came even closer. “Put down your weapons and surrender! You cannot kill us all!”

“Don’ matter,” came the low voice behind Kieron.

Startled, Kieron stepped out of the way, as Djara came forward. He looked to the ground behind her, and saw Penny, eyes closed, motionless. Djara never met Kieron’s eyes; she stared past him, toward the enemy. Her eyes were dead as she stared down the Ilonan. She raised a bloodied hand, and pointed a finger at him.

“Don’ need t’kill everyone. But’m’at leas’ gon’ kill you.”

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Nothing like a crush

I’ve got a thing for her.
Not because he wants her.
Not because she wants him.
Not because she’s
bigger,
better,
prettier than me,
but because she’s gorgeous,
all on her own.
Because she knows
how to dance and
how to bake bread and
how to break bread and
how to to laugh and cry.
Because she wakes me
with kisses,
and tucks me in
the same way.

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Comfort

It was hard to watch,
to know I could have been
something more than I am.

It was hard to look at,
to know instinctively
that my worth had been judged,
set,
carved into time
half a century prior,

and I had not examined it
for flaws,
merely accepted it as it was.
I became the thing
I feared and hated,
because it was the thing
I knew.

Year by year,
inch by inch,
comfort is killing me.

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Fun Shit To Say

“You know, every time I walk down this alleyway, I think I’m gonna see Batman.”

“You know what would make a good band name? Surgical gloves and toast.”

“I’m just gonna put this thing here. In you.”

“You can’t let them get to you like that. Nobody else gets to wear the iron panties.”

“All I ever wanted out of this adventure was an excuse to eat bees.”

“You gotta learn to delegate, honey; you can’t be killin everyone yourself.”

“How come she gets to have a bloodbath?”

“It’s not my fault!”

“Who’s your brilliant, sexy, handsome, covered-in-racoon-guts Daddy?”

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