When I Am Kissing Her

What had I been
before I knew you?
Who am I now
when you’re not with me?
You have taken and changed me,
from someone content
to someone restless.
I look out at the tar sands
and I contemplate
going back to my wife,
our children.
I love them,
but I’m different now.
I love her,
but I am no longer hers.

I had to get away from you,
for a time,
but I found I could not stay away
for long.
Your face was in my mind’s eye
after only an hour.
The taste of your name
was on my tongue
almost immediately.
I think of you
when my fingers touch the keys
and I play for the both of us.
I play, and I pretend
you are beside me.

Maybe at some point,
I will taste wine from your lips,
but until such a time comes,
I will simply breathe in
the thought of you,
and close my eyes
when I am kissing her.

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