Bless me, Father,
for I have sinned.
It has been lifetimes
since my last confession.
I have an evil inside me,
a blackness,
a despair and misery
I cannot contain or control.
It lives, bubbling up, a wellspring,
an unending font.
It seeks to surround
all the things I know and love,
and drown them in darkness,
drown them in hatred,
drown them in loathing.
I have a sucking void
within the bottom of me.
I have an emptiness.
I have a nothing.
I have nothing.
I am nothing.
Liberate me, Father,
from my chains,
lift me from my darkness;
carry me into your heart,
into the light.
Whatever penance be,
I shall do it,
to ease this cold fire
that smothers my heart.
And this one is a song. Don’t say it’s not – cannot be! It’s a hard, thumping song, and it’s ringing in my ears right now.
Hm. I might have to rewrite it so it has a shred of rhythm, in that case.
You’re bound and determined to be encouraging, aren’t you, Lewin?