Kitten

After hanging up the phone and curling up, he couldn’t get himself to sleep, couldn’t find comfort in the loneliness, couldn’t get settled, even when the kitten crawled up into his lap and attempted to nuzzle him for no reason.

One hand laid across grey fur, fingers lazily, absently stroking, and a tiny little heart thumped as a purr resounded happily.

“Must be nice to be a cat,” he mumbled to himself, burying his face in the pillows. “Never really have all that much to worry about. Just snuggle and purr, get fed and sleep, right? Silly cat.”

It mewed.

All the while it was being touched, the grey furball just hoped with all the hope that a tiny thing can muster, that it would prove valuable to this new green-eyed person, and that whatever it’d done to merit being left, it’d never do again.

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Awkward Conversation

“…Thank you for coming ba–”

“Please. Stop. I’m only in here because Danae thinks you’re going to tell me something important.”

“Yes — I am.”

“Then let it out.”

“Terrance, I’ll only ask you this once. Speak to my wife with respect.”

“Your Majesty, if you’ll excuse me, I would prefer never to be in the same realm of existence as your wife, much less the same room, and much less, ever really hear her speak again, if possible. I do not have any respect for her with which I could speak. As a former ambassador of the Summer Court, I had thought you would appreciate my honesty, rather than a stupid facade where I pretend to have such love–”

“Grey–”

“NO. Throw me out. Send me out. Strip me of my ambassadorship. But I will not be anything less than disgusted.”

“You slept with he–”

“She USED m–”

“SHUT UP! The BOTH OF YOU!”

“…”

“…”

“Thank you. Terrence, I’m full with child.”

“As I have seen.”

“It’s yours.”

“…”

“…”

“…”

“Is there anything you want to say?”

“No.”

“No?”

“No.”

“…oh. Is there anything you’d, ah… Do you have any preferences about how–”

“Cast it out.”

“What?”

“That’s my preference.”

“What if –”

“You asked my preference. Cast it out. I want nothing of it.”

“What?”

“I want nothing of it. It isn’t something I can share with Danae. And–if I can be so bold, it’s certainly not something you should share with your beloved. But I want nothing of it. And even if I have nothing of it, I’d prefer no one does.”

“But–”

“No.”

“What?”

“No. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Oh.”

“I’m going now.”

“…”

“…”

“…well. That went well.”

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Please Don't

Snow has come, falling thickly on the ground, melting in the sun, freezing at night, and falling again. Tiny, nearly-dry flakes, and big wet clumps of them; children have snowball fights, make forts — people sled, snowshoe, and generally enjoy the weather when they can, or simply hide away from it, when possible.

His estates are a picturesque example of serenity on the outside; on the inside, he has barricaded himself in his rooms, and is all but hiding from the figure that haunts the grounds, her dark hair flying in the wind, her wings coated with snow, her clothing grown cold and wet.

Servants bring her in, much to his dismay, but he finally acquiesces to them rejuvenating her, “So long as you send her home,” he says.

In the middle of the night, however, she wakes, a soft, low sound of pleading caught in her throat. She goes to his rooms, and with nimble fingers and hairpins, she picks the lock and lets herself inside. She goes to him, crawling into his bed, singing, praying in her language, peeling away her borrowed nightshift. He almost welcomes her, thinking her Justina as he comes out of his dreams, but then she is summarily tossed off the bed with an outraged squawk.

“No!” he cries. “No — I have completed the ritual already,” he murmurs. “I cannot be with you,” he says, trying to hold his hands out, to keep her away.

She twines her fingers with his hands, and so when he moves to pull them away, he pulls her right into his arms again.

“NO.” He moves to push her away again.

She speaks quickly, in her own tongue, and when he shakes his head, looking confused, she switches to their common tongue, pleading “You called me. I can hear it. I can feel it. Please.”

“No, no,” he says. “No. If you won’t go, I’ll have you locked up. Go away. I don’t want to see you. It isn’t you — it’s just that my heart is already taken.”

She nods, rises, and goes to leave, saying “I will come again.”

He nods, understanding, even as he says “Please don’t.”

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Please Don’t

Snow has come, falling thickly on the ground, melting in the sun, freezing at night, and falling again. Tiny, nearly-dry flakes, and big wet clumps of them; children have snowball fights, make forts — people sled, snowshoe, and generally enjoy the weather when they can, or simply hide away from it, when possible.

His estates are a picturesque example of serenity on the outside; on the inside, he has barricaded himself in his rooms, and is all but hiding from the figure that haunts the grounds, her dark hair flying in the wind, her wings coated with snow, her clothing grown cold and wet.

Servants bring her in, much to his dismay, but he finally acquiesces to them rejuvenating her, “So long as you send her home,” he says.

In the middle of the night, however, she wakes, a soft, low sound of pleading caught in her throat. She goes to his rooms, and with nimble fingers and hairpins, she picks the lock and lets herself inside. She goes to him, crawling into his bed, singing, praying in her language, peeling away her borrowed nightshift. He almost welcomes her, thinking her Justina as he comes out of his dreams, but then she is summarily tossed off the bed with an outraged squawk.

“No!” he cries. “No — I have completed the ritual already,” he murmurs. “I cannot be with you,” he says, trying to hold his hands out, to keep her away.

She twines her fingers with his hands, and so when he moves to pull them away, he pulls her right into his arms again.

“NO.” He moves to push her away again.

She speaks quickly, in her own tongue, and when he shakes his head, looking confused, she switches to their common tongue, pleading “You called me. I can hear it. I can feel it. Please.”

“No, no,” he says. “No. If you won’t go, I’ll have you locked up. Go away. I don’t want to see you. It isn’t you — it’s just that my heart is already taken.”

She nods, rises, and goes to leave, saying “I will come again.”

He nods, understanding, even as he says “Please don’t.”

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Curiosity's a Hateful Thing

It took so long for them to find him, so long for them to track him down and pin him in a single location after things had gotten fucked up again.

When the package arrived, the couriers expected a grieving man. Not one who looked wild-eyed and unslept, fourteen-days haggard and pointing a gun at their heads.

He took it, signed and shut the door, all without a word, once he realized what it was.

While she was in the shower, he stared at the box for a long, long time, and wondered if he should actually open it, considering that it was only supposed to come to him on the event of her death.

Were there things inside, better left unknown until she was somehow actually gone?

Curiosity’s a hateful thing.

Her showers were usually long enough — he went through the box, read the letters, looked at the money and stared at the video tape for awhile before he finally put everything away.

He watched the video tape in the bluegrey hours of morning where it still feels like the night before, while she slept the sleep of the eternally drugged and broken.

He’d bought a bottle of scotch, not in celebration, but anticipation of needing the oblivion, but by the time the video was over, there couldn’t have been enough booze in the world to wash away the nightmares of what had been hidden from him for so long.

So easily.

That night, he stood guard in the doorway, watching her, watching the windows, watching the world.

Sunrise was coming, and then would come a beginning to end them all.

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